Thursday, August 18, 2011

You caught between your own lies.


It was stupid of me to believe all of your lies, it was stupid of me to believe you when you said you loved me, and it was stupid of me to give my heart to you and trust you with not hurting me. I could deal with the cheating if you had just owned up to it. I really think I could've, because I really really liked you. I wanted us to work and I was willing to do anything to make sure that happened. But I guess you couldn't handle me finding out what you had done, or you couldn't handle everyone telling me “lies” as you said.

It just kind of sucks cause I actually trusted you when you said forever. I actually trusted you when I gave you all my heart, in such a short period of time. I believed you when you told me I was different, and that you’d change for me. When you told me you knew we were going fast, but that you loved me and were in love with me, hah, I believed that too. The sad thing is, I fell in love with you I think. I was so vulnerable and I fell for you.

Shit that blows? Yea, I was in a three and a half year relationship where I got treated like shit every single day of my life, then I started falling for you. I held my guard up for so long because I was scared of this happening. But oh no, you promised me up and down this wouldn’t happen. And I believed you. But you know what? You lost a good girl. Hell, I’ll miss you sure. But it’s you who lost something good. And like you said, you’re gonna regret this shit later.

No hard feelings to you, I get it. You’ve just taught me the most valuable life lesson, and thank you for that. You taught me to always guard my heart, guard my body, never fall too quickly, never let down your walls to a guy just because he says he’s in love with you, and most importantly: To never trust again.

3 comments:

DrSam said...

Salam Ramadhan al-mubarak CAHAYA.

Tough time won't last, tough people do...and I know you are one tough nut :)

selamat berbuka puasa!

CAHAYA said...

Thanks Dr Sam. Salam Ramadhan.

p/s: waiting for jemputan makan2 hari raya from you. :)

csuciani said...

yes with DrSam up there